CERAMIC THREATS AND OTHER TRUTHS

AN EXPERIMENT IN AGGRESSIVE MARKETING

A few years ago I was invited to a free hair treatment.The “free” part lasted about fifteen minutes — the rest was pure terrorism.

“Your hair follicles are compromised. Your hair will stop growing. Only our treatment can save you.”

The price for this salvation? Modest, of course — about the same as a beautiful intercontinental trip.

Not only did I not go bald, but over the years my hair actually got stronger.The intercontinental trip is still waiting for me.

This morning I woke up inspired by that memory.Why not try the same marketing trick myself?

Here are a few possible slogans:

·        If you don’t start using a LOU ArteCeramica bowl, your soups will always taste like dishwater.

·        If you skip LOU ceramics, your cat will look at you with eternal disdain.

·        If you don’t choose my ceramics, every recipe you find online will end in culinary disaster.

But I want to push it further, darker, more merciless:

·        Keep resisting my ceramics, and your portions will shrink while the calories triple.

·        And beware: if you don’t choose LOU ArteCeramica plates and bowls, your shoelaces will untie by themselves. First the left, then the right.

Of course, none of this is true.

What is true:

My ceramics.The bowls, plates, cups, and home pieces I create.The care I put into shaping them for you.

And what I truly want is for the world you bring into your home to be filled with beauty and meaning.Whoever understands my creations, understands this.

And no threat will ever carry more weight than that awareness.

Whith hart and hands

LOU ArteCeramica